


Flowers for You

by uesakahatsue



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Character Death, Flowers, Hanahaki Disease, M/M, Sad, Sad Ending, Surgery
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-21
Updated: 2020-09-21
Packaged: 2021-03-08 01:33:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,289
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26577616
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/uesakahatsue/pseuds/uesakahatsue
Summary: "SOMETHING'S UP WITH KENMA-SAN!""H-he... he started coughing wisteria!"
Relationships: Kozume Kenma & Kuroo Tetsurou, Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou
Comments: 10
Kudos: 66





	Flowers for You

**Author's Note:**

> I abolutely abhor people who steal others' works and claim it as their own. Don't even dare, sweetie.

⸙.

『それは平和でした...すべてがそうでした。』

It was a peaceful Friday afternoon. We just finished our afternoon training and was about to go home.

"What's taking Kenma too long?" Tora asked, walking back and forth the gym. "Lev, go check on him."

"E-eh? Why me?"

"The changing room's too far, so you can go there faster with those long legs, right?"

"B-but it's too far, and I'm tired..."

"Just think of it as a post-training to make you an ace." As soon as I said that, he threw his bag on the floor and ran as fast as he could to the changing room.

"That kid," Yaku scowled as he picks up Lev's bag and brushed the dust off. "He's such a simpleton."

"That's why it's easy to make him do things, don't you think— ack!" I winced in pain.

"Don't make Lev do so many things, geez," Yaku said after slamming his hand on my back. "He's not like Kenma, but he can still get pretty tired, you know?"

"Uhm... speaking of Kenma-san..." Shibayama's voice went up out of the blue. "Don't you guys notice anything strange with him?"

"Strange?" Kai looked up, holding his chin. "Well, he does get tired faster these days. But other than that, there's nothing different about him."

"Y-You see, I saw Kenma-san once coug—"

"KUROO-SAN! YAKU-SAN! EVERYONE!" All of us flinched when we heard Lev's voice. "HELP! SOMETHING'S UP WITH KENMA-SAN!"

We looked at each other, probably unsure if we heard it right.

"Kenma..." Kai mumbled. All of us knew what that means...

"Let's go."

... to go to Kenma as fast as we could.

"KENMA!" I yelled before arriving in front of the doorway. "What happened?"

Kenma as lying down on the floor, facing the wall. Lev's right hand was on Kenma's mouth as he cough, and his left is rubbing Kenma's back.

"Kenma-san... h-he—" Lev showed me his hands full of blood and petals of...

"Wisteria floribunda?" My eyes widened. "K-Kenma, you..."

"Did he eat it? It's poisonous!"

"N-No... He coughed it out..."

"No way..."

"Hanahaki?" Kai searched for his water bottle inside his bag and went to Kenma. "Can you move?"

"H-hn..."

"Alright, I'm going to lift you up, okay?" Kai held Kenma's back to make him sit, and now he's facing us. "Drink this."

He looks horrible— his blood smeared all over his face and neck, mixed with his tears that are continuously falling down his cheeks.

There's no time to stand around. I pulled out my extra face towel to wipe it away from his face. "Kenma, can you breathe properly?"

"H-hn..."

"I-I'll call coach!"

"Kenma-san, are you okay?"

He replied with a single nod, slowly waving his wand back and forth, telling us to not worry about him.

"Silly, how can we not?" I asked, folding my towel and started rubbing it gently on his face. "You're literally coughing blood."

"I-I'm... I'm oka— AAACK!" He pushed the towel away from his face and faced sideways, as more blood and petals are oozing out of his lips. He panted loudly after that, completely exhausted.

"That's... hanahaki, right?" Shibayama asked as he moves his notebook back and forth, giving Kenma a little bit of air.

"Hanahaki?" Lev asked while he was wiping off Kenma's blood on his fingers.

"It's an illness where you cough petals— or even flowers," Shibayama explained. "When you like someone but they don't like you back, that disease occurs."

"But isn't wisteria poisonous?"

"There's no specific flower for the disease, but the patient will always cough out their crush's favorite flower."

"Fukurodani's Akaashi was once diagnosed with it too, and he started coughing out roses and thorns. Thankfully, Bokuto liked him back, so it was eventually cured."

Kenma rested his whole body on Kai's knee, closing his eyes. "I... I'm sorry... f-for..."

"Don't force yourself to speak," I said, passing the towel to Lev. "Wash it, please."

"O-okay."

"It's okay," Yaku calmed him down, firmly roaming his hand on his back up and down. "Are you okay now?"

"H-hn..." He looked at me. "D-don't... look at m-me... like... t-that... I... I swear... I'm... o-okay..."

"How long have you been coughing these?" I asked, completely ignoring his dialogues. "These are poisonous. Your body will be poisoned from the inside if this continues."

"W-what... can... I... d-do?" He let out a gentle smile that surprised every single one of us. "I-It... it looks like... h-he doesn't... like me... a-at all."

"Kenma..." Yaku muttered under his breath.

"Who is it?" Kai asked, brushing Kenma's hairs away from his face as Shibayama continue to cool him down. "We can talk to him."

Kenma raised his hand and waved it, gesturing a 'no'. "H-he... will just feel... m-mo... more guilty..."

"Guys! Coach's here!"

"Kenma! What happened?"

***

"So it was indeed hanahaki, huh."

"Poor Kenma."

"It just sucks that he doesn't want to let us know who it is. Well, it's his privacy, but I don't want to see him like that."

I'm standing in front of the clinic with Yaku, Kai, and Fukunaga. The rest had gone home already. Kenma was resting inside.

It was truly a shock to see him like that. All of us care for Kenma, and I know everyone feels the same heartwrenching feeling that makes our hearts clench whenever we see him weaker than usual.

"Find people whose favorite flower is wisteria," Fukunaga suggested.

"I bet they're many," Yaku looked away. "How can we even sort it out?"

"Kenma only knows a very small amount of people, so it's easy," I answered. "I'll take him home today, so you guys can go already."

"Okay, then. See you on Monday." Kai waved his hand with a gentle smile, while Fukunaga just bowed his head down.

"How about you, Yaku?"

"I have something to ask you before I go home," Yaku seriously looked at me. "What's your favorite flower?"

"... why are you asking me?"

"We're always opposite when it comes to likes and dislikes," He explained. "I like short-haired girls, but you like long-haired better. I like mountains, while you like the beach. With flowers, I like the cosmos, because they grow in autumn. In what season does wisteria grow?"

I sighed in defeat. "Spring."

"Judging from your face, it looks like you knew it yourself," Yaku tiptoed and placed his hand on my left shoulder. "Help out Kenma, Kuroo."

"I can't." I gently brushed his hand off my shoulder. "I like Kenma, but not romantically. We're just friends."

"Then what should he do?" Yaku frantically asked. "Should he die, just like that?"

I remained silent. He continued. "I asked Shibayama earlier. He said he once saw Kenma coughing out petals, but there was no blood back then. It was three months ago. Hanahaki lasts for two to three months, Kuroo. Do you get my point?"

I nodded, and he sighed. "I'm glad you do. Then, I'll see you on Monday."

Hanahaki disease only lasts for two to three months, until the flowers fill up Kenma's lungs and lead to his death. Kenma is born with a weak and fragile body. Not to mention, my favorite flower is really poisonous. My fist clenched as I smack my head on the wall. C'mon, Kuroo... Time is running out. You better do something.

"Kuroo." A soft voice called me from behind. "Why did you wait? I can come home alone."

I plastered a timid smile on my face. "It's already dark outside. Some people are waiting for you to sell your organs, y'know?"

"Don't worry, it's filled with flowers anyway, so they won't benefit from it." He took his bag on my hand and started walking.

"How are you?"

"Totally fine."

"What did the nurse say?"

"That I should go to the hospital because it's getting out of hand."

"Will you go?"

"Of course. I don't want to die yet."

"What if I liked you back?"

He stopped, as he looks back to me. His wide, golden cat eyes are staring at me with full intensity.

I know, Kenma. I know it's me. I'm sorry for acting clueless. But I don't want to throw our friendship away.

"That would be nice," He let out a delicate smile before facing forward again. "... but I don't have enough time to wait for you."

He started walking again as if it's nothing. He may look like a person who doesn't care at all, even if he's close to dying, but I can see it: his hands trembling, his shoulders slumped down, and his shaky steps. He's scared.

"Why didn't you tell me?" I yelled. "You should've told me from the start. We can still cure it without the surgery, Kenma. If you told me about it in the first place, then I would try my best to like you b—"

"So what? So you can love me out of pity?" He let out, cutting me off. "I'm pathetic but I'm not desperate, Kuroo. I'll suffer more knowing that you only liked me because of this stupid illness."

"B-but—"

"You rooster. It's going to be alright," He took out his game console from his pocket and made it spin with his fingers. "I don't want to die, too."

I smiled, sighing in relief. "You better set for us more once you got back."

"That's tiresome. I don't want it. I'm quitting."

"Oi, Kenma~! You can't quit!"

"Then don't make my training harder."

"Such a lazy brat."

"I'm proud to be one."

***

Two weeks have passed, and according to his parents, his surgical removal will be due this Wednesday. Since then, he was forced to stay at home, which made him happy since he "won't see us anymore".

"Why don't you go to the hospital? Didn't your condition get worse?" I asked Kenma while we're in the middle of a player versus player combat. Every day, we play video games in his room once I come home from school.

He looks like he's enjoying the comfort of home, lying down on his stomach, while sipping his drink that was on the floor. He does cough from time to time, but it was not as severe as he did last last Friday.

"I don't want to stay there. It's boring." He answered, quickly pressing and spamming his right button. "I'll only go there once it's time for the surgery."

"You better listen to the doctor there."

"I'm not a kid anymore."

I snickered. We finished the game with my victory, so I stood up and looked at him. "Yay! You have to treat m— Kenma?"

He's clutching his chest with his right hand, while he used his left to help him sit up.

"Urk!" He quickly covered his mouth and coughed, and I immediately saw some blood dripping on his hands.

I quickly took the tissue box beside his bed and gave it to him. "Do you need me to call your Mom?"

"N-no— urk! G—ack!"

"Kenma!"

He waved his hand in front of me, getting another bunch of tissues, piled them up before placing it on his lips, ready to catch any blood and petals that fall off.

I feel so useless. I'm just standing there, rubbing his back, as I watch him cough helplessly. What kind of a person am I? I'm such a useless scumbag.

"A-ACK!" I panicked when Kenma's eyes widened and his back arched up as he loosens his grip on the tissues. He started wincing as he grips on his neck tightly. "A-ack! Gggh..."

"Kenma! W-what do you want me to do?" I wanted to call his mother but he kept gesturing to me that I shouldn't. He placed his fist on his back as if he's telling me that I should slam it hard. "Are you sure?"

"D-do it— GACK!"

With his permission, I slammed his back down with my brute strength. I felt his tiny body trembling as he uses his frail arms as a support to keep him from falling down, letting the blood ooze out of his mouth to the wooden floor.

"Gggh— ack! Ha... h-ha... Nnngh!" I watched him as he pants on the floor as if he's forcing for something to come out.

What should I do... what should I do? Fck it, WHAT SHOULD I DO?

Eventually, I saw a cluster of wisteria come out of his mouth— but I was surprised when I saw the whole cluster of bluish-purple flowers— it was at least five inches long, covered in blood.

He collapsed on the floor, not minding the small pool of blood sticking on his blond hair, heavily breathing. 

"Y-you coughed out... a whole c-cluster..."

"H-ha... Ha..." His teary eyes looked at me. "T-this one... is one of the largest, so hide it from Mom and throw it— w-what... what are you doing?"

I enclosed the bloody wisteria with tissue and placed it on the table."I'm keeping it."

"W-why? It's gross... it's covered with my blood and saliva."

"This is a sign that I am very useless when someone needs my help." I seriously said as I wipe the tiny splatters of blood off the floor. "I did nothing but to watch."

"If... if you didn't slam my back earlier, the cluster would've just been trapped in my throat and I'll die... so don't think like that."

I scoffed, putting the tissue papers in the trash can. "You sure are talking a lot today, Kenma."

"Shut up."

***

The day after his surgery. I was intently waiting for his mom to come by.

"Tetsurou, can't that wait? Eat first."

"Later, grandma," I answered. "Kozume-obasan is going to our house."

"Yes, I know, but eat first."

I sighed in defeat before going to the dining table. The reason why I'm like this is because of Kenma. I stopped by his house yesterday, and he said: "After my surgery, I'll have my mother send a letter to you and the others."

"Couldn't you just tell us in e-mail?" I asked.

"I think letters stay longer than e-mails. I like the smell of paper, too."

"Then, I'll wait for your letter."

Then, the moment of truth came.

My hands were trembling as soon as I took the letter from Kenma's mother. He looked a lot like her— I can't even predict the results just by looking at her face.

It was a red envelope with a cat sticker on its opening. After peeling it off, I saw a scented paper folded in three. I sniffed it and I found out what the scent is right away— wisteria.

His handwriting was rigid and hard to understand— it was odd from his normal penmanship. In a sense, it looks... rushed.

—

➺ From: Kozume Kenma  
➺ To: Kuroo Tetsurou

Hello, Stupid.

✑ If you're reading this, then I'm probably already done with the surgery. I won't tell you about the results yet— because you probably won't read it anymore.

I wrote this letter while I'm waiting for those doctors to come in. Letters are very lame and cringeworthy, but I like them more than wannabe bandwagons.

I'll be honest here for the first time, so read carefully.

Kuroo, I really do like you. I don't know why I liked you— maybe it's because it's fun to see you grow from the silent Kuroo to that loud idiot who always shames us whenever he says that cringey speech before every match.

Ah, writing a letter is too tiring than I thought. I'm going to take a rest for ten minutes.

Okay, I can write again. As I was saying, I don't really know why I liked you. I just knew it. I don't want you to like me back because of this illness, because liking someone is a little bit fun... I guess.

I don't really care if you like me back. After my surgery, the feelings that I have for you will disappear as well, so I'm writing this letter so I can remember the feeling of liking someone stupid like you. But still, don't show it to me once I started going to school again, because I might die out of cringe.

Say, Kuroo. Why do you like wisteria? I admit, they do smell nice, but it's poisonous. It tastes bitter whenever I spit them out. Next time, pick an edible flower. Geez.

Don't feel bad about yourself. You're not responsible for this, since I'm the one who chose to like you. It's not like you can stop me, right? You're the captain inside of the court but you're just a human too. I'm not anticipating you to help me perfectly— your presence was enough. Actually, ew. I'm really cringing about this now.

Don't I sound nicer and noisier with letters? I like it, I can tell everything I want to tell you without interruptions— aside from this nurse that told me that it's already my turn and they're moving me already.

I didn't tell you about my results at all, haha. Then, let's make more letters like this. You can go to our house to find out about it. Make sure to visit me here in the hospital and bring me my PSP.

Tell the results to everyone too,  
Kenma. ⸙

—

I clenched the letter in my hand and scurried to their house, practicing what should I say to Kenma when we meet.

"Do you still know me?" I smiled. "No, that's too dumb."

"Kenma, there's a bug under you!" I pointed on the floor while running. "No, he just got from surgery."

"Are you okay?" I thumped on their door three times. "Yeah, that sounds right. Let's ask him that one.

"Tetsurou-kun?"

"Oba-san, sorry to disturb you this late," I bowed once before lifting up my head. "Kenma said in his letter that I should ask you about his results. When is he going to be discharged?"

"H-he... he's not going to be admitted to the hospital."

"W-wait a minute, oba-san," I forced myself to chuckle as I show her the letter. "See? Kenma even said that I should bring his beloved PSP tomorrow."

"The doctor found out... an enormous bunch of clusters in his lungs, one of them is already twelve inches long." 

"N-no..."

"It trapped his airway on his—"

"Oba-san..." I kneeled down. "Please tell me the truth. I'm not really in the mood for the jokes now."

"I'm not joking, Tetsurou-kun." His mother said with her stern voice towering over me. "Kenma stopped breathing as soon as he dropped the fountain pen on his table. That letter was the last thing that he did."

Kenma.

"Some of them said that he was supposed to die a lot sooner, probably thirty minutes earlier, but he held his cough just to finish the letter."

"I am really holding back my emotions right now Tetsurou-kun, so please visit here tomorrow."

"O-Oba-san..." I murmured. "I'm sorry."

"It's not your fault." She smiled gently. Her eyes are already teary but I saw her biting her lower lip, regaining her composure as long as she could. As she closed the door, all I could see was their family's surname carved on the wooden door, as the moonlight illuminates it flawlessly.

"Kenma..." I sat down on the floor, lost at what should I do. I'm so fcking stupid.

I held the wisteria from him, sniffing it. It was a blend of this corroded smell from his blood and the fragrant aroma of the flower. I'm so ignorant. I'm so foolish. I'm so despicable.

But Kenma...

'I don't want to die, too.'

You lied to me.

『すみません、ケンマ。私はあなたを救うことに失敗しました。』

⸙.

**Author's Note:**

> Find full-length AU's at:
> 
> FB: Ryuuichi Aone  
> Wattpad: @clamaranthine


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